Bow chicka woo woo

I've said it more than once; one of my dearest hopes is to live long enough to see unequivocal proof of the existence of extraterrestrial intelligence.  A lot of people share this desire, to judge by the popularity of shows like the various iterations of Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, and Lost in Space, not to mention dozens of movies, of which Stargate, Contact, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, and 2001: A Space Odyssey stand out in my memory, the last-mentioned because it demonstrates the general principle that there is no idea so interesting that someone can't elaborate upon it in such a way as to make it catastrophically boring.

The fascination our species has with aliens also explains the fact that people keep seeing them.  As far as I've seen -- and I've read a lot of accounts of UFOs and so on -- they fall into two categories:

1. People misidentifying ordinary non-alien phenomena, such as the cop who was chasing a UFO as he was driving down a winding road, and it turned out that what he was chasing was the planet Venus.
2. Outright hoaxes.

Sad to say, I've yet to see a claim that's convinced me, although I'd sure like to.  For me, though, it'd have to be pretty persuasive -- it's all too easy to be fooled.  But if an alien ship landed in my back yard, and three-eyed blue guys from the planet Gzork came out to shake my hand with their tentacles, I'd have no choice other than to believe.

Or, as in the case of David Huggins of Georgia, who is releasing a documentary (available for streaming) on December 12 in which he claims that he not only contacted aliens, he had sex with 'em.

Amor Alien by Laura Molina [image courtesy of the Wikimedia Commons]

The documentary, which is titled (I shit you not) Love & Saucers, described his repeated liaisons with an alien named "Crescent," with whom he had sixty hybrid half-human, half-alien children.  Which makes me wonder: do these aliens have litters, like dogs?  Because if each child was the product of one (1) sex act and one (1) pregnancy, they either have a hell of a short gestation period or else they are really horny.  Huggins is now in his seventies, and he said his first time having sex with Crescent was when he was 17, so that is (give or take) fathering a child a year from ages 17 to seventy-something.

Which is a lot of hot human/alien whoopee.

Despite all of this, he had enough zip left to father a human son with his human wife, Janet, although the article does say that David and Janet Huggins are now divorced.  Understandable, considering the number of times he cheated on her with his extraterrestrial girlfriend.

And apparently Crescent didn't just pay him conjugal visits in his home, she also brought him back to her spaceship.  She forbade Huggins from telling anyone about their liaisons and their children.  The prohibition apparently didn't accomplish much, because not only has Huggins made a documentary, he's written a book, and done numerous paintings (most of them highly NSFW) of him fucking an alien.

Which to me is more than a little skeevy.

Be that as it may, I have my doubts about the story on a purely biological basis.  If there was a life form who had evolved on another planet, completely separated from Earth, there is no reason to expect they would be sexually compatible with humans, including having orifices and appendages of the right size and shape, if you get my drift.  Furthermore, even if alien life is DNA based -- which is possible, as DNA nucleotides are abiotically synthesizable under the right conditions -- it is extremely unlikely that it would be similar enough to ours that we could produce viable hybrids, given that most terrestrial species can't interbreed and produce offspring.

But maybe Crescent took care of all that in her spaceship's laboratory, I dunno.

So anyway, when the documentary is available next week, I highly recommend watching it, if for no other reason the humor value.  As far as Huggins's account, though, I'm not buying it.  My guess is that it's nothing more than a prurient imagination and desire for fame and attention.  Me, I'm hoping that if the aliens do land in my back yard, they won't be looking for love.  For one thing, I'm happily married, and my wife would disapprove.  For another, my kids are grown and living on their own, and the last thing I want at this stage in my life is to be changing the diapers of a half-alien, half-human baby.

Human/alien sex and impossible blood types

As I have mentioned before, my commitment to a rationalist approach is not because I think that odd explanations are impossible.  Ockham's Razor, after all, is a rule of thumb, not an unbreakable law.  Sometimes nature is weird and messy; sometimes it is counterintuitive; sometimes the convoluted explanation turns out to be correct.

Still, it's frustrating to see the ease with which some people jump to a bizarre conclusion.  Witness the contention, currently making the round of social media such as Facebook, that you should have your blood type checked and do a little standard genetic analysis, because you may have an "impossible blood type" -- one that is impossible, given the blood types of your parents.

Which means that you were actually sired by an alien from another planet.

Okay, let's just step back from this claim for a moment.

First, here's a short statistical genetics lesson to refresh the basics with folks who may not remember high school biology too well.

Let's say we have a couple who has just conceived a baby.  The man is AB- and the woman O-.  The ABO antigen group and the Rh (negative or positive) antigen inherit independently, so we can consider them separately.  The fact that the man is AB and the woman O means that, given Mendel's Law of Inheritance, the baby will have gotten one allele from each parent.  The dad can pass on an A or a B (but not both); the mom can only pass on an O (O is recessive, so she has two copies of the O allele).  The baby therefore could have a blood type of A or B, and in fact has a 50% likelihood of one versus the other.  As the Rh negative allele is recessive, we know each parent has two copies of the Rh negative allele; the baby can only be Rh negative him (or her) self.  Thus, the baby could be A- or B-; all other blood types are impossible.

Recently, though, we have a claim spinning its way around the internet that there are folks out there who do have "impossible blood types" -- children with blood types that could not occur, according to standard statistical genetics, from the pair of parents who produced them.  And these children, the claim says, are the results of aliens abducting, and then impregnating, human women.

And my response is:  Really?

There are two much better explanations as to why a child may have an "impossible blood type" (or any other "impossible" combination of genetic traits) than assuming that the mother of the child was beamed up to a waiting spaceship to engage in some hot human/alien sex.

The first is that there is a perfectly natural, albeit rather peculiar, genetic explanation for the odd result.  I know of two genetic conditions that result in abnormal blood type inheritance -- Bombay syndrome (in which another gene "cancels" the blood type the child inherited, causing an aberrant type O) and cis-AB (in which because of an improper crossover event, the child inherits both the A and the B antigen from the same parent -- so the child is an AB regardless of what the other parent contributed).  Both of these conditions are rather rare, but each certainly gives a natural explanation for the odd results in the claim.

The other explanation is even more likely, but is one I hesitate to bring up -- and that is that the child might not be the biological offspring of that father.  Euphemistically-named "non-paternity events" -- cases where a child is not the biological offspring of the man who thinks he sired it -- are more common than you'd think.  Genetic testing in America, Canada, and western Europe give amazingly consistent results, averaging 1% of the children tested being the result of extramarital sex -- and that's excluding children who are adopted or who are known to be the product of a previous relationship.

So one child out of a hundred isn't the genetic offspring of the man who claims to have done the deed.  No aliens necessary, although an explanation from the mother may be.

So, anyhow, it's not that I think that aliens are impossible.  It's not even that I think that it's impossible that they've visited the Earth, although I do think it's unlikely.  Even more unlikely is that the aliens are so out-of-control horny that the first thing they do upon arrival is to look around for some human women to hook up with.  So as an explanation of why some children have unexpected blood types, it kind of sucks.  Why the people who made this claim -- and those who are now forwarding it endlessly around the internet -- think this makes better sense than some perfectly natural explanation, such as a genetic aberration or the baby being sired by the mailman -- makes no sense to me at all.  Unless, perhaps, these people would fancy having an illicit liaison with Mr. Spock themselves, and think that if they wish upon a star, their dream will come true.