Hi! Hope you're having a lovely day so far. Enjoy what you can of it, because we're all gonna die today.
At least that's the contention of the Usual Suspects on the interwebz. The whole thing started ten days ago, when a German politician named Friedrich Metz was giving a speech, and said, "Dear colleagues…September 24, 2022 will be remembered by all of us as a day which we will say, 'I remember exactly where I was…'"
Then (depending on who you believe) either the mic cut out or else he just refused to elaborate further. Of course, this immediately caused multiple orgasms amongst the conspiracy theory types, who took Metz's statement and crafted it into what was basically a Mad Libs for wingnuts, of the form "[Choose one from column A] stopped Metz from talking because they don't want people finding out that [Choose one from column B] is going to happen."
Choices for A:
- The Bilderberg Group
- The Illuminati
- The Jews
- The Far Right
- The Far Left
- Gray aliens from Zeta Reticuli
- The Reptilians
Choices for B:
- a gigantic solar flare that will wipe out the electrical grid
- a massive engineered cyclone headed for the US Gulf Coast
- the complete collapse of the world economy
- a collision from a huge meteorite
- a deliberately-planned worldwide blackout
- an electromagnetic pulse that will turn anyone who has 5G into a mind-controlled zombie
- a supervolcano eruption
- the sudden takeover of major world governments by either the Far Left or the Far Right (depending on which one you went for before)
- an open alien invasion