After Thursday's post about nonexistent islands, a loyal reader of Skeptophilia asked me if I'd ever heard of the country of Listenbourg.
I said, "Do you mean Luxembourg?" but he assured me he was spelling it right.
"Islands aren't the only thing that can be nonexistent," he said, which is true, but when you think about it too hard is a very peculiar statement.
So I looked into Listenbourg, and it's quite a story -- especially since the whole thing started as a way to ridicule Americans for their ignorance about anything outside the borders of the United States.
In October of 2022, a French guy named Gaspard Hoelscher posted a doctored map of Europe on Twitter that looked like this:
You'd think anyone who'd ever given more than a ten-second look at an actual map of Europe would immediately know this was a joke, but no. Even a closer look at this map would have revealed the curious fact that "Listenbourg" is actually a resized and inverted copy of the outline of France itself, simply pasted onto (and partially covering) the northwest corners of Spain and Portugal.
Apparently, this was not the case, as the original post caused a number of irate Americans to jump up and defend our superior knowledge -- almost none of whom, however, came right out and said that they recognized it was a prank. You could tell that some of them had actually come damn close to saying, "Of course I know where Listenbourg is," but held back at the last minute.
This prompted a flood of hilarity online that the prank's originator, Hoelscher, said "totally overwhelmed" him. Amused Europeans invented a flag, capital city ("Lurenberg"), culture, history, language, and even a national anthem for Listenbourg. It has five regions, they said: Flußerde, Kusterde, Mitteland, Adrias and Caséière. A post saying that Hoelscher himself was the president was met by universal acclaim. Then it escaped social media into the wider world:
- An announcement prior to the Paris Olympics of 2024 stated that "The number of Olympic delegations has risen from 206 to 207 with the arrival of Listenbourg."
- Amazon Prime in Europe announced that a documentary on the history of Listenbourg was in production -- only careful watchers noticed that the projected release date was "February 31, 2025."
- Ryanair said in a press release that they were "Proud to be announcing their new base in Listenbourg."
- The French television network TF1 aired a realistic-sounding weather report for the country.
- French politician Jean Lassalle said in a speech that he was "just returned from a visit to an agricultural seminar in Lurenberg."
- The city of Nice said that they were happy to announce their intention to become a sister city to Lurenberg, and that there would be new inexpensive flights between the two.
I have to admit that as an American, my laughter over all this is coupled with a distinct edge of cringe. I mean, being global dumbasses is not exactly the reputation I'd like my country to have. Sadly, though, I can't really argue with the assessment. You don't have to dig very hard to find highly embarrassing videos of interviewers stopping people in crowds in the United States to ask them tough questions like "What is the capital of England?" and finding numerous Americans who can't come up with the answer. And with the Republicans currently doing everything in their power to destroy our system of public education, the situation is only going to get worse.
Oh, but don't worry. At least we'll have the Ten Commandments on the wall of every classroom, and students will get Bible lessons every day and won't be exposed to scary books like Heather Has Two Mommies.
Hey, I wonder what would happen if you asked Donald Trump to find Listenbourg on a map? I bet he'd never realize he was being pranked, considering that he once gave a speech to African leaders and confidently talked about the proud country of "Nambia."
Look, I know we all have holes in our knowledge; all of us are ignorant about some subjects. The important thing is not to make ignorance a permanent condition -- or to flaunt it. Stubbornly persisting in your state of ignorance has a name.
It's called "stupidity."
What's worse is when people think they are experts on stuff when they're clearly not, and publicly trumpet their own idiocy. (Donald Trump is absolutely the poster child for this phenomenon.) As Stephen Hawking trenchantly put it, "The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge." Because if you're convinced you already know everything you need to know -- and that, I'm afraid, is the state of many Americans, including the majority of our elected officials -- you have no incentive to learn more, or worse, to find out you're actually wrong about something.
My dad used to say "there's nothing as dangerous as confident stupidity." I think that's spot-on. And sad that the Listenbourg incident -- funny as it is -- pointed out that in the eyes of many people in the world, that's what the United States represents.
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